Stop the bleeding
Words that don’t suck.
Copywriting and Google Ads from a writer who believes our voices are still worth something. I write your words. I run your ads. I find out within a month whether the ads were any good.
Not feeling confident about your landing page? Send it my way, and I’ll have a look. Free of charge.
A confession
From the guy who owns this site
In 2016 I was newly separated in a foreign country where I didn’t speak the language, and I wrote three words for a fishing app startup in Stockholm: Love Fishing More.
I was deep into Ogilvy at the time, learning direct response the way you learn a language, by stealing sentences and adapting structure. But that line didn’t come from a rule. It came from a place closer to the heart. It felt right.
I wandered after that. Became a rated commercial pilot and flight instructor. Figured out how to run paid Google Ads. And down the road, even got a chance to run ads for a multi-state healthcare practice.
Somewhere along the way, my voice got fainter. I was slipping into corpo-robo speak: Less friction. More customers. Human first. For growth.
It sounded like a mustard-stained corporate pamphlet gathering dust on a desk. Forgettable and forgotten. The kind of thing you put out there to avoid losing a client rather than to win one.
My first copywriting site was called Words That Don’t Suck. It was rude, it was mine, and it brought in more work than anything I’ve written since. It came down in 2018 when I stopped paying for the hosting and told myself, “Screw this marketing stuff, I’m going to fly.”
Life goes in a circle. I’m putting the name back up. Not to be rude for sport. To write from the gut again, and let the rules do the job they’re actually for: cleaning up after the gut.
I’ve written a horror novel, Pure Evil. Three thousand strangers have rated it on Amazon, and not all of them were kind, which is the second-best copywriting education there is. The best one: I’ve managed more than two million dollars of other people’s ad money and watched, in real time, which words made strangers click and which made them leave. In my mind, that’s the copywriting and performance marketing school that counts. It’s the one where you pay for the test.
If you want copy that keeps everyone comfortable, there are ten thousand people who’ll write it for you, and now a dozen machines that can crank it out in 60 seconds. If you want words that sound like a person and sell like they mean it, keep scrolling.
— Jesse
The rules are what you reach for when you don’t feel anything.
What I do
Copywriting
Landing pages, emails, ads, the four words on the button. All of it goes through me. There’s a 3,000-word post on this site about why I don’t let a machine do the whole thing. Short version: your competitors already do, and they all sound the same now.
Google Ads
Stop the bleeding in your Google Ads account. I run the campaigns too, which means my copy gets graded by strangers signing up for services every day. I’ve got a fire under my ass to get you results. I also stay on top of the systems, because Google’s algos can be merciless at spending budgets if you’re not careful.
12% of ad spend. $1,000 monthly minimum. No contract.
The page that’s leaking
Sometimes the fix isn’t more words. It’s one fewer form field, one fewer step, one sentence that makes people flinch. I look for the spot in your funnel where a single change does the most damage to your cost per customer.
Pricing on request
Who this is for
A fit
A business spending real money on ads, where a new customer is worth four figures or more, and where somebody can change the landing page without convening a committee.
Not a fit
Anyone who wants a report instead of a change. Anyone whose copy needs six approvals. Anyone who wants to sound like everyone else in their industry. That last one is most people, and that’s fine. It’s also exactly why this works for the ones who don’t.
A note for the doctors and the lawyers
I’ve written for medical practices where you have to be uber careful about what you say, and nothing about a patient ever leaves the building. Just because I sound one way on my site doesn’t mean I’m going to put that voice on yours (unless you want it that way). You’re the customer, you have unique risks to manage, and we work together to get through them.
Reading first? Start with Google Ads for law firms or HIPAA-compliant conversion tracking for Google Ads, both free on the guides site.
Proof, the kind I’m allowed to show
7-figures in Google Ads spend managed. Other people’s money, with an obsession on cost per booked new customer.
“Love Fishing More.” Fishbrain, 2016. Maybe the best three words I’ve been paid for.
Author of Pure Evil. A horror novel about a kid from Maine. You might hate it. Some people don’t. 3,000+ Amazon ratings.
Active in r/PPC. You’ll find my posts in the daylight.
From Maine. Lives in Sweden. Long story. Ask on the call.
Questions people actually ask
Will you use AI to write my copy?
Sigh. I’m going to use AI as my assistant. Not as my copy chief. FYI, I spent a year trying to be AI-first and it made me a worse writer and a lazier thinker. There’s a long post about it under Thoughts. The important stuff, the stuff I do for you, that all has to go through me.
Why pay a copywriter when ChatGPT is free?
Because it’s free for your competitors too. Every landing page in your category now has the same cadence, the same “Unlock,” the same “Elevate.” Writing from the heart (or from someplace south of that) is the last unfair advantage left, and readers are getting faster at spotting the difference.
Can you be edgy and keep my compliance officer calm?
Yes. The edge is in how you speak, and how much of the truth you dare to say, not in the claims. Honest copy with a pulse. Imagine that.
How much does it cost?
Google Ads: 12% of ad spend with a $1,000 monthly minimum, no lock-in, cancel when you like. Copywriting: a quote after I’ve read your page, because otherwise I’d be guessing, and I don’t guess with your money.
What happens after I send my landing page?
I read it like a customer would. I write back with what might be costing you people, and why. No deck, no “discovery call.” If I think I can move your number, I’ll say so. If I can’t, I’ll tell you that too, which is rarer than it should be.
Two questions and a link.
What do you spend a month on ads? What’s a new customer worth to you? Paste the page you’re sending that traffic to.
I’ll reply with whether I can move your number, and the first thing I’d change. In writing. No charge, and you don’t owe me a call.